Coming Out of the Closet

Well, it’s time. I’ve been in the closet too long. I just got to get this out there… public opinion be damned.

It’s hard though, you know. I’ve lived this double life for so long. I just don’t know what it will be like to be out in the open. It’s a scary step, however, a necessary one. There is no doubt about it. I can’t keep lying to myself and to those I love.

OK, here it goes…

I do Yoga.

Yup, I know. How could this happen. I played lots of different sports in highschool. I lifted weights. I’m a normal, heteroathletic guy. Or, at least I appeared to be.

I’ve known since I was 12. It was awkward when I first discovered how I was. I felt like I was wrong somehow. I mean “Yoga”? Who the hell does Yoga? Especially in North Idaho.

At that early age I was unaware of the implications of freely admitting my ‘alternate lifestyle’. Once, when talking to a young classmate, I told him I do Yoga. He said “Oh, my mom says talking to dead people is bad.” This made me nervous. I didn’t think I was talking to dead people… but who knows… maybe I was.

I don’t mean to complain. My family is very supportive. I knew, from the beginning that I could tell them. That they would love me unconditionally. That they would support me no matter how I chose to move my body.

But, their acceptance didn’t help me in the wider world of Northern Idaho. Friends would say, “Hey, lets go shoot hoops” and I would be forced to accept, when in fact all I wanted to do was touch my toes.

I don’t just do Yoga recreationally. No, it’s moved beyond that. It’s turned into something very serious. It’s turned into a pursuit that takes up a considerable amount of my time and energy.

So, next time you ask me, “Hey, lets drink so much vodka that we throw up all over each other,” remember this post. When I say, “Nah, I just washed my pants…” understand that what I’m really saying is “Nah, I would rather go twist my body into awkward positions and drink rice milk.”

Ah, I feel better already.